Ok, so we all know what knackers are right? Pikies, scumbags, chavs etc.. EVERYWHERE seems to have them but i when i came to Hungary somehow i thought it would be an exception....apparently not.
Today whilst walking the dog i came across a very stylish young lady (please note sarcasm)supporting a gold plastic fur-rimmed jacket with matching gold jeans and trainers. To add to the ensemble she wore gold earrings, an orange tan and had the top half of her hair dyed brown and the bottom half dyed blonde.Safe to say i was nearly blinded by the sun reflecting off her golden-self... Would any other self respecting person other than a chav walk out the door in this?!!! i mean really?! HOW tacky can you get?!!
In Hungary they seem to favour the gold plastic look, whereas in Ireland, the ever popular velour matching tracksuit set is always in style. Not only is it worn in colours such as fuchsia pink and lime green, it is teamed with socks tucked into runners and a charming pair of gold earrings. The outfit is NEVER complete with out each hand being decked out in the TACKIEST MOTHA FUCKIN' GOLD RINGS I HAVE EVER SEEN....
Now as for the male knacker...in Hungary they like their leather jackets, but also have a bit of a taste for the plastic fur rimmed ones. Tracksuit bottoms, hair slicked back,tracksuit tucked into socks, and techno music blaring out of the phone in his hand...the epitome of sexiness (*GAG*) In Ireland they have a bit more labels than the poor aul Hungarian knackers...they model a wide range of Lacoste, Le Coque Sportif, Fred Perry, Burrberry and it seems as if they are now moving on to Ralph Lauren!All of course worn in the tackiest way possible...The male knacker, last i saw, seems to favour stripes and believes a peaked cap and a giant diamond earring will attract the opposite sex so they can mate and produce baby knackers who will come out of the womb with gold earrings on, a velour trackie and a fur lined body warmer! All i can say is....they breed 'em young =/
Now i've nothing against knackers...just their fashion sense...i mean REALLY who in their right mind thinks THAT is sexy?! (chavs are not allowed to answer as you are obviously not in your right mind...) The worst is when they're out on the town wearing belt-sized skirts, halter-necks that show waaaay too much (especially if they're on the round side) and the characteristic hoop earrings. Seriously...cover up!!! or if you want to parade some flesh get a nice short dress and do it in style!!!!
I firmly believe they are a species all of their own (formed by inbreeding no doubt..) They seem to have their own language "an' can tawlk loike dis da hole ty-um" (possibly a bit of D4 thrown in there,but it's a hard language to write..especially for those of us who have the basics in spelling) Sometimes when back home in Ireland i felt like i was talking to a foreigner...i hadn't a CLUE what the ol' knackers were on about...and now that i'm in Hungary i haven't a clue what ANYONE is going on about! (especially the little old ladys who like to stop and chat to you in hungarian =/ ) They are a timeless species who, i have found out, have also invaded the main portion of Europe. Is there no-where that will remain chav-free?
I ask you, when the world finally ends will the Knackers and the cockroaches be all that's left hinding under a rock somewhere?
Stay away from gold and fur and velour people.
Love Your One And Only PitBitch
xXx
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